2012 | Day 160: Is your world just a broken promise...your love just a drop of rain...

MOTIVATIONAL OF THE DAY

YOU are the CREATOR of your OWN DESTINY

Quote for Reflection: “♥ The creation of your REALITY begins with your THOUGHTS ~ “BAIT” your “HOOK” properly! ♥ COGNITIONS will bring the identical EXHIBITIONS into your life. You will “ATTRACT” back a certain “fish” based on the “LURE” that you USE, so be very SELECTIVE with the one that you CHOOSE! Before “CASTING” your “LINE”, make sure the “CHUM” is “IN line” with the EXACT fish that you would like to see COME! ♥ EXPECT only the BEST for yourself and have your ACTIONS follow suit with those thoughts. If you want the “BIGGEST” fish in the OCEAN, do not select a “ROD” that cannot handle the “MOTION”! ♥ BELIEVE yourself to be capable of attracting the grandest fish of the “SEAS”…IMAGINE bass and trout, without thoughts of minnows or anchovies! Do not allow your thoughts to “BOB” up-and-down as to what you are DESERVING of. Believe yourself to be worthy of the most “prize-winning” “GAME”…and that is exactly what you will “REEL IN” ♥ If you “CATCH” yourself thinking negative thoughts, simply “RELEASE” them and refocus on “PULLING IN” POSITIVITY. “TURN THE TIDE” of life in your favor by looking for the “UPSIDE” in all circumstances ♥ Become a “MAGNET” for all things AMAZING! You do not have to travel in a “SCHOOL” to be aware that your MIND is your greatest “TOOL”…use it to “TACKLE” life, “HOOK, LINE, & SINKER!!” ♥” - Lauren Christine Frahn

TRAINING

Session 1

HIIT Run:
a. 4 min jogging
b. 28 x 20 sec sprint/10 sec easy
c. 4 min jogging

Stretch 29 min

Shoulders (1 min recovery between sets):
1. Behind-the-neck BB Military Press 4 x 15, 12, 9, 9
2. BB Military Press 4 x 10 9, 8, 8
2. Plate Lateral Raises 4 x 15

Post-Weights Cardio:
Rollers 20 min @ 105 rpm

Session 2

Hamstrings (1 min recovery between sets):
1. Stiff-Legged Barbell Deadlift (on bench, reaching barbell down 6 inches) 4 x 12

Post-Weights Cardio:
Run 3 miles

OTHER NOTES

Sleep: ~6 hours, after having to exhaust myself to get TO sleep first. Woke from dreams so real the emotion they evoked was as if they HAD happened.

Energy: There, calmly.

Joints: Pain in both delt/biceps' tendons. And in my LEFT shoulder deep in the joint.

Pump: With the newest Assault, I get this hard and fast, no matter what I have done PRIOR to weights, nothing or something, which is one of the things I am liking about this formula.

Quality of Training: Back to my HIIT OUTside - it was nice, but also very hot and only got hotter, making it a little hard to breathe. Did 28 sprints as fast as I could, feeling it in my left shoulder during and after...Down to the basement today for weights. The other skipping rope that I have is not a speed rope and can be annoying to use, so I left the skipping from my resistance session/s today. Shoulders in the morning, Hamstrings in the evening. Anterior delts in a lot of pain, particularly in my left shoulder during most exercises, and winced my way through them - hence also the lower volume of that session, which only took 20 minutes to do (very short compared to my usual 50-60 minutes of intensity)...Hamstrings were fine - no Assault before this session, since it was so short and can't even really even be called a session, IMO. Then 3-mile run afterwards, just to make my body suffer more, welcoming the pain...

Supplements: Recompadrol is available again (so I'll have some more by the end of the week)!

2012 | Day 93: I find everything I thought I lost...

MOTIVATIONAL QUOTE OF THE DAY

"Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars." - Khalil Gibran

For the complete Motivational, review Losing Everything | WPM Women.

TRAINING

HIIT Run:
a. 4 min jogging
b. 24 x 20 sprint/10 sec easy
c. 4 min jogging

Shoulders/Hamstrings (30 sec recovery between supersets):
SuperSet A -
1. Behind-the-neck BB Military Press 4 x 12, 10, 8, 8
2. Skip 4 x 100 revolutions
SuperSet B -
3. Rear Delt Flyes 2 x 15
4. Skip 2 x 100 revolutions
SuperSet C -
5. BB Military Press 4 x 12, 10, 10, 8
6. Skip 4 x 100 revolutions
SuperSet D -
7. Plate Hammer Raises 2 x 15
8. Skip 2 x 100 revolutions
SuperSet E -
9. Single-Arm DB Lateral Raises 4 x 12 per side
10. Skip 4 x 100 revolutions
SuperSet F -
11. Plate Lateral Raises 2 x 15
12. Skip 2 x 100 revolutions
SuperSet G -
13. Stiff-Legged BB Deadlifts (on bench, reaching down 6 inches with the BB) 4 x 12
14. Skip 4 x 100 revolutions
SuperSet H -
15. Swissball Leg Curls 2 x 15
16. Skip 2 x 100 revolutions

Post-Weights Cardio:
Recline Bike 20 min @ 110-113 rpm

Stretch 20 min

NO sleep last night - could NOT sleep at all, my mind wandering restlessly...Got up at 0330 and started preparing myself for the day...Felt pretty great heading out for my HIIT Run, no aches in my knees, which was surprising, but awesome. Little light along the highway this time, so I ended up doing my sprints one and then turn, then another, turn, over the same road, up and down a rise, until I had done what I needed to, running back to the hotel. Left shoulder (and left wrist) was the only thing that irritated me - still aching a little from hitting it on the Elliptical handle last night...Looked forward to my weights. Same weights as last time on all exercises, but MORE reps, despite the shooting pain through both shoulders (more on that later), so STRENGTH is up a little, which is nice (or maybe my body just needed to do SOMEthing the last couple of days and only have it a SINGLE training, instead of am AND pm sessions?) Anyways, it was the POSTERIOR LATERAL aspect of my LEFT shoulder that burned during Behind-the-neck BB Military Press, becoming sharper with each consecutive set. Rear Flyes were done a little more slowly than usual, the pain in my left shoulder still prominent. NO issues with knees during the skipping in SuperSets A or B. ANTERIOR delt/biceps tendon on my RIGHT side caused issue during BB Military Press, but able to manage it better than the pain experienced during Behind-the-neck BB Military Press. Plate Hammer Raises started off strong, but reps got slower for the last three on each set. Right knee started niggling during skipping of the second SuperSet C, but disappeared during the skipping on SuperSet D, LEFT knee aching instead - all very odd. Pain in BOTH shoulders during Single-Arm DB Lateral Raises, starting with my right side first each time, since my left shoulder was in more pain than my right. Pushed our 12 reps from the 10 reps of last week though, even though the last two reps on the last set for each side was a GRIMACE. Got quite light-headed and dizzy after the skipping for SuperSet E. Used plates instead of DB for SuperSet F, doing them a little more quickly than usual, tempo 1-1-1, trying to make it intense but also hoping to minimize pain experienced - anterior and lateral delt definition good during; shoulders are definitely looking better. Increased the pace of my skipping in SuperSet F. Did more reps with the Stiff-Legged BB Deadlift - easy enough; I never use a heavy weight with this, focusing instead on the STRETCH, and next week I might see how low to the floor I can reach standing on a bench (used for Flat BB Bench Press). Feeling my left hip niggle a little during the skipping after each set of the former. Last but not least, finished off my resistance session with Swissball Leg Curls, keeping my hips high, rapid skipping pace after each set. Vascularity EXCELLENT throughout the ENTIRE session...Was rather surprised when I got on the Recline Bike re post-weights cardio and found myself EASILY able to maintain a pace of 110 rpm or more withOUT any issues with either knee. Welcome - maybe the hot/cold spa/pool on Saturday night did some good after all...My left wrist has been aching ALL day, the same way it did just before last August, which is NOT good, so I will be watching it...I WAS going to go for a 7-mile Run tonight, but have not been able to sleep at all during today, and just want to go to bed early (after I finish posting this, actually) and let myself DRIFT AWAY...

OTHER NOTES

EBF's Recompadrol will be available again in ~8 weeks (better yet, hopefully by the end of APRIL)! Just to make you all aware if you purchase some and the labels are different that they HAVE had a label CHANGE - updated to match the current brand logo, with the next run being done having 400 bottles still with the old label and the rest with the new, all to be with the new label after that.

2012 | Day 92: Being strong, holding on...I won't give up that easily...

MOTIVATIONAL QUOTE OF THE DAY

"I am one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do." - Edward Everett Hale

For the complete Motivational, review I AM ONE | WPM Women.

TRAINING

Elliptical 20 min

Stretch 20 min

New hotel, new Fitness Room, so very different to the one before. But, before that...Last night I was not able to sleep. Ended up going down to the pool, alternating between hot and cold, the spa and the pool, trying to relax my mind (and it was good for my body). The coolness of the pool was welcome after the heat of the spa, being under the water so very calming. I help myself under the water as long as I could, pushing it (as I do with everything), coming to the surface only when I was at the point of opening my mouth to breathe, before going back under. Almost silence beneath the water, the only sound (or feeling rather), the beating of my heart, becoming more urgent as I forced myself to stay under longer and longer, wanting to STAY there in the stillness, even as I knew that even if I stopped, Life would continue on. Anyways, the hot/cold helped my legs, and my knees have been fine today...When I eventually drifted off, sleep was disruptive and disturbing, and even on waking several times, I just went back to bed and wanted to stay there...Right, the Fitness Room. Did 20 minutes on the Elliptical (since it was all they had - that and a treadmill, and I will NOT use a treadmill). "Stumbled" after ~8 minutes and "fell" against the moving handles (no, I don't hold them, but have my arms at my sides, almost as if I was running), hitting the left lateral tip of my collarbone against it, so just another hurt to add to all the pain, LOL. My right knee was fine with the Elliptical, which was interesting, because usually they hurt my knees in general, because of their pattern of movement. So, from now on, all pm cardio sessions will be done running - distance anywhere from 3-7 miles, knowing me, likely to be seven...

OTHER NOTES

Body Composition

9% bodyfat - another 0.5% bodyfat INcrease from last week (0.1% gain for each "bad" day of eating). Despite my best INTENTIONS of NEVER wanting another week like last week re nutrition, although not as BAD as last week, this week was still NOT good - although my training was MORE intense than last week, which IS a good thing. Definitely feeling (and seeing) the change from the 8% bodyfat I was two weeks ago - believe me, 1% bodyfat can look so very different when you get to this level, and to the individual, it can feel like you've gained a HOUSE...I've gained a little more muscle mass in my shoulders, and my upper body has actually started looking LEANER despite the INcrease in body composition, so that is a small comfort...Vascularity (like last week) has also been getting better and better - definitely my elevated body temperature and high carbohydrate intake playing roles there...I have two weeks to get UNDER 8% bodyfat (because I WANT to be that lean, for those who always ask why I want to go so low), and there IS hope yet, because I KNOW that I CAN do it in the timeframe I have - I have done it in the past (twice!), and I WILL do it again (and being a higher body composition should make it "easier" to get leaner again)! I MUST!

Supplements

I continued using G8 this week - stopping it though on Saturday, because aside from the changes in sleeping patterns and my nutrition, this is the ONLY thing that has changed over the last two weeks - which could give rise to the thought that it might possibly be the "cause" of those changes, but is only speculation. Either way, I have chosen to stop using it...I also used the last of my Recompadrol yesterday and will have no more of that until the end of April (when more will be available)...

Supplementary Notes

Appetite has continued to be HIGH-HIGH this week, and no, I was not as disciplined as I SHOULD have been (even though inside my head I was screaming at myself "WTF ARE YOU DOING?!", hating myself for every second of it!), but it has helped in the gain of a little lean muscle, so looking on the "bright" side, was "worth" it...Sleep has continued to be disrupted, moreso the latter half of the week, but sleeping periods have "calmed" down from the ridiculous 12-13 hours of last week to a more "normal" 4-5 hours (with the exception of last night - where I allowed myself to just go back to sleep after waking up after ~5 hours, wanting to stay in bed and not particularly want to get up)...Body temperature has continued to be elevated this week, and every day I've been so hot (no beanies worn during training this week, LOL). That said, I've suddenly got surprisingly cold, almost shivering at one point in the afternoon to evening almost EVERY day, which is a little unusual... Joints have gradually gotten worse. Both my right AND left shoulder/biceps' tendons have been an almost constant ache on waking, during training, and throughout the day, even attempting sleep, the pain growing to become a sharp, stinging bite that does not leave, so I am going to have to watch them closely, because I do NOT want to be "put out" again! Right knee has been in pain, swollen and tight for the most part, but being pushed to see what it will take. Left wrist requires a little watching, since there has been a deep pain in the scaphoid region during a few exercises...

April MuscleBombshell Contest

Thank you to everyone who supported me in this contest. It was eventually stopped at the discretion of the person running it, but I WILL be the Cover Model for July (yes, YOU know why I picked that month).

Rosie Chee Fitness Newsletter April Edition

This will be up later today.

So much for "no more falling behind". Although I'm left at the end the week feeling so completely emotionally exhausted and mentally mashed-to-pieces, this week has been a definite learning curve, the starting point of several surprised and exciting projects. Yes, my "time out" for myself is now over, and it has certainly been interesting - much needed and very valuable, and I come out of it knowing my strength and my direction. Life still continues to throw me curveballs, but I know what I will allow and what I will no longer tolerate - that, with a light heart cast in shadow and God by my side, I can and WILL face ANYthing!

Day 323: So Ends the REAL Week OFF

Quote of the Day

"No one can continue without hope." - Gregori, Dark Curse (Christine Feehan)

Training

Let's take a brief look back after the last 7 weeks:

1. The week post-competition I did two resistance sessions and four cardio sessions;
2. The second week post-competition I did Maintenance training;
3. The third week post-competition I did four resistance sessions and six cardio sessions;
4. The fourth week post-competition I did Maintenance training;
5. The fifth week post-competition I did four resistance sessions and six cardio sessions;
6. The sixth week post competition I did Maintenance training;
7. This last week I have done ONE day of training, essentially making it the long needed week OFF.

That makes it 25 weeks since my last week off. On top of my terrible few days of caffeine withdrawal, this WEEK OFF has been LONG OVERDUE, and despite my stubbornness in determining never to have another COMPLETE week off ever again, because of everything over the last couple of weeks, my body has pretty much forced the issue. Now that it's done, I should be able to return to normal training from tomorrow . . .

Comments

Energy: Still exhausted.

Mental Focus and Clarity: Better today - now it's time to do everything I should have gotten done over the week when i could not concentrate!

Stress: Back above the red warning line . . .

Libido: It's been a highly demanding week . . . Pity it doesn't make one FORGET . . .

Body Composition and Look: Yes, I've gained some scale weight over this last week. However, unlike in the past when my weight fluctuates up and down like it has been, my girths have not really changed over the week from last week, staying the same, so something is doing SOMEthing - whether it's the Erase (3,7-keto DHEA IS good stuff) or the extra extracurricular activity taking the place of training, I don't know . . .

Other Notes: Last application of Eviscerate Smolder tonight . . . Second day of Recompadrol . . .

Question of the Day

Minds wander and we go with them; what would it be like to soar away with them and never come back?

Day 321: I truly am an Addict!

Quote of the Day

"All the breaks you need in life wait within your imagination. Imagination is the workshop of your mind, capable of turning mind energy into accomplishment and wealth." - Napoleon Hill

Training

None.

The funny thing is, this would have been my week OFF training if I had competed as originally planned last weekend. Weird how things turn out.

Comments

Sleep - Time and Quality: I've spent the last few days doing not a lot else but sleeping - and now I know WHY . . .

Mood/Aggression: NOT good.

Energy: I have none.

Mental Focus and Clarity: I have not a lot of this either.

Stress: It's a small stress off knowing why I am feeling like this.

Libido: Demands upon demands here.

Recovery: It's not about what I've been doing or not doing, but about what I have not been having.

Other Notes: It's not the higher dose of Erase. It's not the lack of water that I've had over the past few days. It's not the highly upsetting and stressful events of the last week. It's my body going through STIMULANT WITHDRAWAL - and FAST. Didn't take long at all - barely a day withOUT BLACK CATS and I may as well have had someone sounding a battering ram in my head. I KNOW I have a serious problem - I'm NOT functional withOUT stimulants, and LOTS of them, which is nothing good, to say the least. I HAVE to get more, and STRONG ones at that, tomorrow, so that I can start LIVING again! . . . On that note, I used the last of my NeoVar Recomped today, so will be starting CreaPure again tomorrow . . . May also add in Recompadrol as my nutrient repartitioner, since I don't do well without one of those either . . . I am DEFINITELY going to have to learn to TAKE CARE of my HEALTH and STOP DESTROYING myself!

Question of the Day

Is the night ever truly black? Is it as dark as we sometimes think it is, or no, because there is never ever really a true absence of light?