EVOLUTION OF A PURPOSE DRIVEN WARRIOR

August 21, 2018

"People fear what they don't understand. They're afraid, and they're jealous. Afraid because they're slowly realizing that everything that they imagined is not how they imagined it to be, and they're jealous because everything they've ever wanted, you have." - Adriel Cellardoor

I failed to see the red flags or realize until AFTER the fact, in the wake of your obsessive destruction, that you were no "friend" and never had been, but hollow soul, who for whatever reason was jealous of me, how I lived my life, and those freesoul energy attracted, my sanity especially.

You thought what you told me would keep me from my sanity? Though conflicted from recent revelations, I chose to follow my heart and do what makes me happy as I did before, having known things then too and put them aside, because too much has happened to be deterred from staying true to my soul and enjoying any time that I was given.

Your first mistake was thinking I was like most and not what I said I was, even though you should have known better. Your second was that I would easily believe rumors of another, when I of all people know how false they can be. Your third was not understanding how much I have changed since last year's deaths, fully embracing the darkness of my demons keeping me going.

Do not tell me what I should and should not do with my life. Do not expect me to stay away from someone because you "disapprove". Do not think for one second that I will allow anyone to control or cage me again. I belong to no one and live on my own terms. I do what I want for no reason other than such, recognizing though that my loyalty often comes at expense of my wellbeing, and I need to take better care of myself. Which is why I will no longer sacrifice for any but my sanity, those moments of happiness I am given what has been my only peace.

In rage triggered by me ignoring your "let it go", unable to stand another with the happiness you have so long coveted, your wicked truth was revealed, and with hateful lies you tore my sanity away, hurting another precious soul in the process. How DARE you ever claim love for those whose trust you have so hideously abused! Mindboggled.

Favourite Quotes

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." - Philippians 4:13

"TRUST in HIM, who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think." - Ephesians 3:20

"Look back and thank God. Look forward and trust God. Look within and find God! God closes doors no man can open and God opens doors no man can close!" - Unknown

"'For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.'" - Jeremiah 29:11-13

"Impossible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. IMPOSSIBLE is nothing. How are you going to live your life?" - U.S. Army

"I succeed because I am willing to do the things you are not. I will fight against the odds. I will sacrifice. I am not shacked by fear, insecurity or doubt. I feel those emotions but I drink them in and swallow them away to the blackness of hell. I am motivated by accomplishment, not pride. Pride consumes the weak and kills their heart from inside. If I fall... I will get up. If I am beaten... I will return. I will never give up... EVER." - Nike

"The biggest risk in life is to risk nothing at all." - Anonymous

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that frightens us. Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others." - Marianne Williamson

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt

"It’s not about what you’ve got; it’s about what you DO with what you’ve got.” – Andie West, Step Up 2: The Streets

"To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift." – Steve Prefontaine

"Never, never, never, never give up." - Winston Churchill

"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place, and I don't care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward; how much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that!...until you start believing in yourself, you ain't gonna have a life...Cause if you're willing to go through all the battling you got to go through to get where you want to get, who's got the right to stop you? I mean maybe some of you guys got something you never finished, something you really want to do, something you never said to someone, something...and you're told no, even after you paid your dues? Who's got the right to tell you that, who? Nobody! It's your right to listen to your gut, it ain't nobody's right to say no after you earned the right to be where you want to be and do what you want to do!...You know, the older I get the more things I gotta leave behind, that's life. The only thing I'm asking you guys to leave on the table...is what's right." - Rocky Balboa

"Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength." - Arnold Schwarzenegger

"Nothing in the world is permanent and we are foolish when we ask anything to last, but surely we are still more foolish not to take delight in it while we have it." – William Somerset Maughan

"There comes a time when you have to stand up and shout: This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision. When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the opportunities that life presents you." - Stacey Charter

EVOLUTION OF A PURPOSE DRIVEN WARRIOR

August 21, 2018

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